There are so many definitions of trauma. Just like there are multiple and varied impacts of experiencing trauma
The dictionary definition is ‘a deeply distressing or disturbing experience’.
It’s broad.
A common psychotherapeutic statement is that ‘trauma is not only what happens to you but is what happens as a result of what happened to you’. Which I think is attributed to Gabor Matte.
A common consequence is disconnection from our physical experience.
If we have been unsafe and without resource or power to do anything to become safe, we have one powerful tool left to us – dissociate. Get away from there in the only way we can. By mentally being somewhere else. By physically flopping or freezing.
Disconnecting from our physical selves is an essential survival mechanism, akin to the animal that plays dead to be left alone by the predator.
It can however become a chronic state. It can become the default reaction to perceived danger and even a way of being in the world.
And when we do that we are losing vital information about our here and now experience which can leave us at best confused, as we wonder why yet again we have pushed through our need to rest for example…and at worst in danger as we are so disconnected from vital information that we ignore danger and our gut instinct about it.
When I read about dissociation and it’s function I am always astounded at the intricate complexity of or biological systems. It seems such an unlikely thing that we could mentally remove ourselves and yet we can.
That’s is the job of the dorsal vagal system.
When we are subject to overwhelming and inescapable threat our bodies are flooded with neurotransmitters and hormones which are designed to achieve one aim
Survival.
If our survival is threatened the bodies systems go into shut down, flooding us with endorphins to minimise the pain, slowing our heart rate and breathing: to minimise the impact on vital systems, diverting blood to our internal organs to preserve the parts of us that are most needed.
We become less aware of our bodily sensations as neurotransmitters are redirected for one purpose. Our perception is impacted our memory, our ability to physically move, our emotional connection – everything.
It’s as if we have an internal Parent protecting us from knowing the things we cannot cope with who sends us off into another room. No need for you to see this it won’t help.
It is a very important survival response.
And it has consequences.
It can leave us with gaps in our experience – but we learn from experience so what happens then?
It can leave us disconnected from our physical reality as the vigilant response of our survival system overrides the evidence of the moment, leaving us without vital information.
Reconnecting to our sensation, reclaiming our bodies as our own is a fundamental part of psychotherapy.
Reconnecting is complicated. It’s ok not to. To not reconnect might be important for where you are right now.
That said – If you have experienced trauma, or been present when something catastrophic happened, then reconnecting to your body can be the beginning of working through and making sense of your experience.
You might want to do this with the support and encouragement of a psychotherapist. Trauma disconnects us, so recovery starts with connection, often to another person who can help us. While reaching for that help can be frightening, reconnecting is possible.
Reconnecting to our physical bodies, to our emotional states, to our intuition, to others, to the world after trauma is done therapeutically in small careful steps.
Like physiotherapy for a physical injury, there is a process of healing which the therapist will support, towards the ultimate goal of being here and now, connected to our experience.